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We need and deserve ‘the village’ as parents a

We need and deserve ‘the village’ as parents and we’re just not getting it.

It’s totally ok to not be ok. It’s ok to feel overwhelmed as a parent - caring for children is a lot in any capacity and we were designed to get a ton of support. We were never meant to be doing this in isolated hyper independent nuclear families 💔

The antidote, is to not beat YOURSELF up over the fact that parenting is a lot. Don’t add guilt and shame and self judgement into the mix too. Drop the guilt sticks. Actively stop yourself from thinking bad thoughts about yourself and your parenting and replace it with self compassion.

This is soooo much easier said than done, of course. We are culturally conditioned from young to feel a lot of guilt and shame to fit into current society.

It’s ok not to be ok.

#awareparenting #unschooling #ittakesavillage

Feels important to say that the reason I share all

Feels important to say that the reason I share all this shit is because I truly believe that one generation of children parented with Aware Parenting - attachment style parenting, connectedness, non-punitive discipline, trauma informed & trauma healing, full acceptance of your child’s entire range of emotions (as a start) - will HEAL THE WORLD and we won’t have all the horrors we do today.

Mother Teresa: “What can you do to promote world peace? Go home and love your family.”

#awareparenting #peaceonearth #itstartsathome

These last few months of 2023 have been powerful f

These last few months of 2023 have been powerful for releasing old hurts, have you sensed that too?
After my challenging week last week with a move whilst pregnant and a sick toddler, I felt an old hurt of being alone with a big move crop up from childhood. When I really tapped into the feeling I realized that it wasn’t a feeling from now alone. In fact I wasn’t alone now, I had my husband in the thick of it with me. I had my mom preparing meals for us, and looking after the big kids. And I had so many lovely people holding me in their thoughts and sending us best wishes - they really make a difference.
The old hurt I remembered being 9 years old and being shouted at by my teacher for not learning my spelling words that week, we had just moved to a new school, a new city and I am sure my mom and dad were as overwhelmed as I was last week and no-one ensured I learned my words, and I certainly didn’t remember to, so I failed my first spelling test.
I took some time to connect with that 9 year old little me and told her it was so ok to not know her words, that the teacher was wrong to shout at her, and that I would protect her.
I also went back to a more recent time, my last move when it was myself and my mom who got sick, and it was over Christmas and no-one had the energy to make it festive for the children and we ended up eating toasted cheese sarmies for lunch. I spent some time with that Christine, telling her it was ok to not be ok.
I feel like the releasing of these old hurts is preparation for 2024, and all the big plans and changes I have for next year. I feel like all of the uncomfortableness I have been feeling is making me willing to take action and shift… and BLOOM…
"And the day came when the risk to remain tight in a bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom." - Anais Nin
Some of the resources that have helped me connect with my inner children, and heal old hurts is the work of @jenpeters_soulguide_healer and @_marion_rose_ . Marion’s work in particular has helped me release the shame for ‘not being ok’ all the time.
A reminder that I have created a workbook designed to help you with clarity and to set goals for 2024. See my bio ❤️

A big week of moving and a baby with chicken pox,

A big week of moving and a baby with chicken pox, culminating today with my eldest turning 13. Wow. Sweet boy you are so special and so loved ❤️ Cake made by my mom @thyme.toflourish 🌸

It’s been a week of realizing my own limits and my self worth. After 20 years of being a renter and a landlord, I have never seen a home handed over to new tenants (us) in such a gross condition. Every cupboard has had to be scrubbed before I unpacked and the bathrooms were next level 🤢.

To top it off my cellphone gave up after me nursing it with a cracked screen for months. This morning it started randomly calling people and sending crazy messages. Plus I couldn’t get into my internet banking to purchase a top up of electricity. Hubby came to my rescue and got a new screen fitted in 30 minutes. He also personally moved every piece of furniture & box himself with his bakkie. Last pic was his last load this evening - exhausted. Thank you love @itsme_alandrew ❤️

As for my poor baby, luckily she seems to have a very mild case of the pox, and two days on homeopathic meds is already feeling and looking much better. Is it Friday yet? 🥴

By 6am we’d already ‘read’ this word picture

By 6am we’d already ‘read’ this word picture book 5 gazillion times 😆🥰

Reminds me how children (and adults frankly) learn by becoming obsessively interested and mono focussed. My 13 year old still does this, becoming obsessed on a topic until his curiosity has been satiated and he’s learned all he wants, and then he moves on to a new topic. It’s how I learn too.

#unschooling #unschoolingtoddlers #motherhood

The one that made me a mom ❤️Almost 13 years a

The one that made me a mom ❤️Almost 13 years ago.

And the one who started me on this deep (continuous) journey of self awareness and healing. As a new mom and before I was filled with feelings of shame, self doubt and self loathing. I was living my life desperately trying to please others, gain their approval, gain their love.

When I had my son I finally had a purpose - I was J’s mom. And he was so loved, so cherished. That little boost of approval & self worth was so healing I finally realized I didn’t need it. I finally realized that outer approval even outer love didn’t build self worth, not like inner approval and self love.

My journey of deep self compassion and self love started with this sweet boy.

“The most difficult part of birth is the first year afterwards. It is the year of travail – when the soul of a woman must birth the mother inside her. The emotional labour pains of becoming a mother are far greater than the physical pangs of birth; these are the growing surges of your heart as it pushes out selfishness and fear and makes room for sacrifice and love. It is a private and silent birth of the soul, but it is no less holy than the event of childbirth, perhaps it is even more sacred.” – Joy Kusek

#becomingmom #motherhoodrising #selfhealers

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